Leaving Your Narcissistic Parent Behind – Five Steps

Growing up as the child of a narcissistic parent is one of the most difficult and complex life histories a child can experience. The psychopathology of the narcissist is deep and daunting. As a baby and young child you were subjected to the full force of the narcissistic personality. Quoting from my book: Recovering and Healing After the Narcissist offers a clear picture of this fixed, personality: Narcissistic personality disorders are characterized by extreme self-absorption, lack of empathy, ruthlessness, incapacity for emotional intimacy, volcanic rage, chronic lying, deceit and exploitation… The narcissist lacks a conscience; his sense of right and wrong is determined by how clever he is at not being exposed or punished for his unethical, immoral and illegal behavior.

The narcissist believes he/she is superior to others. He has an overriding sense of self-entitlement…For the narcissist, everyone is disposable; one person is interchangeable with another. .He has neither a memory nor one scintilla of concern about the victims of his psychological crimes…Beneath the elaborate mask of a grandiose false self, the narcissist unconsciously experiences a deep, intractable psychological emptiness.

  1. Your restoration and healing begins with your deep research and study of the true nature of the narcissistic parent. Your understanding of the narcissistic personality provides you with psychological and emotional distance from this non parent.

You are taking the initiative to separate yourself from the narcissistic mother or father who was incapable of attachment, love, caring, warmth, empathy, protection or guidance. This is a foundational step for moving forward as a psychologically grounded individual.

  1. Children of narcissistic parents grow up with blocked emotions. Their feelings were stifled because it was psychologically dangerous to express themselves. When we squelch ourselves we cannot be spontaneous. We are constantly putting the brakes on our self expression. Growing up as the child of a narcissist we are required to tow the line, to model our reactions to the tune and timing of this distorted, demanding, derisive personality. Being in one of these homes is like what psychoanalyst Alice Miller call a kind of prison.  In her first book she named these children Prisoners of Childhood.

Now that you are in the process of awakening to yourself allow feelings to come through. When you feel laughter bubbling up let it blossom ; when tears form and fall from your eyes, let them flow. Spontaneous writing is a creative way of releasing feelings that are often hidden from the rational. Take a pen and pad or notebook and let yourself write whatever comes up without editing or judgment. This is an incredible tool of discovery and creative. Long hidden feelings, memories and thoughts come to consciousness and are expressed by you on the page. This is a part of the real you that has been hidden for a long time that is now being expressed in the most unique beautiful way.

3.    Recognizing that the deprivations and psychological abuse projected on to you was not your fault. You were the innocent child the victim of the narcissistic parent’s cruel, wanton projections. The cruel words and criticisms that you at times still hear inside of your mind were manifestations of your narcissistic parent’s psychopathology and had nothing to do with your true essence. You were on the receiving end as an innocent child who was blameless. Take this truth inside and let it resonate deeply within you.  Rest in knowing that you were an innocent, a precious child. Feel this deeply in yourself now.

  1. Practice self care each day. Make it simple and do it your way. Get the rest and sleep that you need . If you have trouble sleeping and falling back to sleep, rest.  Do not be judgmental when you have difficulty sleeping. Eat nourishing food, organic if possible. Hydrate well with pure water. Movement and exercise reduce stress, stretch our muscle and make us stronger with greater endurance. Spend time with Nature. Allow its beauty and mystery to captivate you in its magic. When we are engrossed in Nature in the moment we are healing and restoring ourselves.

5.Tap into your creativity each day. This takes as many forms as there are individuals. Think of all the ways you are creative: drawing, painting, sketching, sewing, cooking, baking, singing, dancing, chanting, gardening, all forms of writing, doing research on what fascinates, you, crocheting, knitting, sewing, quilting, photography, woodworking, ceramics, night dreaming, daydreaming, reveries.

And —Be Kind To Yourself!

Linda Martinez-Lewi, Ph.D.

High Level Narcissists – Ultimate Takers, Dissemblers

High Level Narcissists –Ultimate Takers, Dissemblers

High level narcissists are dissemblers, filled with patterns of deceit and corruption.  They conceal the truth from you at every turn. As the partner, spouse or child of a high level narcissist you can  only expect lies and purposeful obfuscation from these individuals.

Some of the things that the high level takes from you:

  1. Your inner peace and senses of solitude  – The high level narcissist is exceedingly demanding – high maintenance on your psychologically and emotionally. It is very difficult to feel relaxed and quiet when you are married to or partnered with a high level narcissist. Many of them are constantly in motion, moving from one activity to the next. They have unquiet minds that are continually demanding your attention, approval, praise and adulation.

2. They Eclipse the amount of time that you can spend in the calming, restorative parasympathetic body/mind systems where you experience healing and restoration. It is always about them; they are the center of the universe and expect you to be worshiping at their throne.

3. It is tiring to be married to a high level who must have his or her ego constantly fed with glowing approval. These individuals are completely bored with others, even their spouses and partners. They are disinterested with your creativity or intellectual pursuits.  They are bored and annoyed with those who possess clear independent thought.  They will steal your creative ideas and pawn them off at their own.

4. High level narcissists are dissemblers who despise the truth. Constructing elaborate lies and obfuscations are the methods that they use to continue to rise up to their over the top positions of power and influence.

5. High levels put untold pressures on you to compromise your well developed conscience.  They work on you to take the easy way through problems which involves lying by omission and commission. They may even offer you financial remuneration or unique gifts to turn a blind eye to ignore and reject your conscience. The pressure to go against your own fine character is often very pronounced.

6.High levels are envious of your creative gifts. Sometimes they lift your original concepts and exploit them for their own purposes. They never admit that they have taken something very precious from you. They don’t care about what they take as long as they fulfill their own selfish goals.

7.High levels wear you down with multiple humiliations that they know will compromise you psychologically and emotionally. If their vile projections keep you in a state of fight or flight day or night, that is your problem. You are to blame.

Ultimately you can never be your true self partnered with a high level narcissist.   They are incapable of developing meaningful, empathic loving relationships.

At a point of deep insight you decide to move forward as a separate individual, independent, free, creative, grounded, steeped in your own wisdom, psychological stamina, unique individuality.

Linda Martinez-Lewi, Ph.D.

 

Rescue Yourself from the Pernicious Shadow of the High Level Narcissist

Rescue Yourself from the Pernicious Shadow of the High Level Narcissist

“..Everyone carries a shadow, and the less it is embodied in the individual’s conscious life, the blacker and denser it is. At all counts, it forms an unconscious snag, thwarting our most well-meant intentions.” Carl Jung

Trapped in a marriage or partnership with a pernicious high level narcissist, an individual obsessed with self and public image, with extreme self-entitlement, very low conscience capacity, often an infant terrible with a dreadful temper that is projected out on to you behind closed doors. This is horrifying to the spouse or child of the high level narcissist. There are the severe criticisms, the humiliations, the exhausting over the top demands, the blatant hypocrisy, the incessant lying in every form imaginable.  More lying to cover other lies; this is endless with the narcissistic personality.

The high level carries from within a primitive, seething Shadow that ejects venom in various forms on to you: false accusations, recriminations, incessant criticisms, withering projections that send you into the dark reaches of the fight or flight nervous system, the sympathetic mode.  You are at the mercy of the narcissist rampant regressed Shadow. The high level vehemently blames you for the pernicious traits, deeds and words that he/she is constantly using. The narcissist never owns his wrongdoings since he believes that he is perfect.  It is in private that you shudder and cower as the spouse takes the full brunt of the narcissistic partner’s disowned shadow.

The opposite occurs in public with the high level who worships his image. Here there is a major shift – the look of the face, the eyes, the movements, pace, style are transformed. We are now under the spell of the narcissist’s very convincing charm offensive mode. The narcissist, an incredible method actor lights up with this charming, charismatic false self.  He/she turns it on like a light switch, a transformation that is highly impressive.

Only you and a small soupcon of others know who this narcissist truly is, a regressed, selfish, self-aggrandizing, greedy, callous, manipulative, ruthless human being.

How much longer can you tolerate the scream fits, volleys of temper, scathing glances, belittling that leave you psychologically and physically weakened.  You don’t and never did deserve to be treated this way.

Make a stand now for yourself.  You deserve to be treated with respect and deference.

With this new opening and beginning you move forward along the pathway of your individuality and creativity, restoration.

You belong to yourself again – spontaneity, joy, awe, beauty, solitude, independence of thought, full appreciation and expressions of yourself.

I want to share some thoughts about the Shadow with you.

For tens of thousands of years man has been dealing with his Shadow in a variety of ways.  Going back to the dawn of time when man first walked the earth upright, he has been infused with the Shadow parts of himself found in the deep unconscious of his psyche.

In primitive cultures there were rituals that provided an outlet and understanding for integrating the shadow within the group and the individual.

Today we are still facing our Shadows.  For many the Shadow remains completely unrecognized by the conscious psyche of the individual.  As human we carry the inheritance of our Shadow selves.  This is not a curse but an incredible boon to those who seek wholeness, individuation and the promise and fulfillment of one’s unique creativity.

We contain the distinct DNA of our ancestors of thousands of years ago. We carry these imprints inside of our body/minds.  I gain comfort and strength and a sense of gratefulness to my brothers and sisters of so long ago with whom we share that which  defines us as humans. Where we walk those who have trodden over the millennia, make the earth their home.  We have much to learn from our instincts and innate pre-ancient wisdom that is part of every one of our cells and our very consciousness.

Linda Martinez-Lewi, Ph.D.

 

 

 

High Level Narcissistic Golden Boy Attracted to Empaths

Recall when you were face to face with an individual who exuded a palpable charm, a kind of erotic force that was impossible to deny, an enchantment.  You felt the pull, a kind of psychophysiological gravity that fixated you on this individual. Right off, you were carried away, ungrounded, happily adrift, unmoored.

I have created a composite of this elite golden boy from individuals who have been described to me from their victims, some I have met, others whom I recognize from biography and psychobiography. .

The golden one of many gifts –often handsome, articulate, at times brilliant, smooths his way through life having been born as a kind of nobility.  From birth the golden boy knows that he is extra special, a prince. He is admired, even adored. In many cases the mother of this wunderkind is psychologically fused with her son.  The narcissistic mother chooses the son as an ultimate narcissistic supply to fill her psychological emptiness. With a father who is psychologically dependent and timid acquiescence to the narcissistic spouse. This dynamic reminds me of the complex and highly charged relationship between world renowned architect Frank Lloyd Wright and his mother Anna Lloyd Jones. Before he was born Anna knew that her son would become a great builder, an architect.

Quoting from my book: Freeing Yourself From the Narcissist in Your Life: “From earliest childhood, she filled him with Celtic tales of a mythological hero named Taliesen who had supernatural powers. Wright chose to call two of his homes, Taliesen. This betrays the force of his mother’s early indoctrination since Taliesin is not only an actual historical personage but also a poet-savior, magician, spinner of riddles and supernatural being.”  Wright was a classic overt narcissistic personality of great talent and vision, who disrupted, controlled, dissembled the personal and professional worlds of others with ruthless abandon.

Enter the Empath, that unique individual of great discernment, intuition and sensitivity. Empaths are often attracted to high level narcissists. Often introverted they are drawn to this individual of towering self confidence, indomitable energy, fearlessness combined with magnetic charm.

The high level narcissist is a clever taker; the empath a consummate giver.  The empath makes the high level look like a very fine person. Besides the empath anticipates the high level’s needs and wishes and extends themselves without question.

Empaths often question themselves and find that they are wanting. If drawn into the narcissist’s enchanted circle the empath is loyal and tends to put up with the projections, criticisms, and humiliations that re being dished out.  Empaths often blame themselves for what others have done to them. Loyal to a fault they continue to forgive the golden boy narcissist his multiple wrongdoings.

There is a point of awakening when the Empath has had more than enough of the high level’s brand of abuse and with research and inner wisdom, decides to move forward along the pathways of the original self and put the emphasis on self-care and creative and personal transformation.

Linda Martinez-Lewi, Ph.D.

High Level Narcissists Spew Their Vile Shadows on to Their Spouses and Children

High Level Narcissists Spew Their Vile Shadows on Their Spouses and Children

Quoting from my book: Recovering and Healing After the Narcissist:

”Psychoanalyst Carl Gustav Jung introduced the archetype of the Shadow, that part of the psyche that…t is largely unconscious and dispossessed…Those who have no conscious acquaintance with their shadow, project forgotten, forbidden and disowned parts of themselves on to others in destructive ways.”

“Those who have no conscious acquaintance with their shadow, project psychologically disowned pars of themselves on to others. When kept out of conscious awareness, the shadow overruns the personality. Like the shadow of the moon in mid-day eclipses the sun, everything becomes dark. The disowned shadow takes retribution against the closed personality, revealing itself in highly destructive ways. The shadow elements that control an individual’s personality are a lethal poison that re projected on to those closest to him—spouses, children and other family members.”

“One way or another, the shadow seeps out, rushes from its hiding place and floods the personality.”

The high level narcissist, though charming, accomplished and charismatic, is psychologically shallow. For most it is the achievement of the perfect image and persona that supersedes the personality.

The high level uses a series of powerful defense mechanisms that keep him/her from searching for self-truth and insight. This is not their focus.  They are driven to succeed in the world, they compete and win against others who would dare to compete with them. Their values are materialistic, have a surface veneer that shines brightly on the outside and hides the shallow empty horrors deep in their disturbed psyches.

Throughout their days, the high level uses the powerful defense of denial which allow him to create his own sense of reality.  The high level is gifted at putting together a flawless package of privilege, luxury, surface beauty, indulgences beyond the imagination. A voluptuary to the core, the high level seeks unending multiple pleasures.

Deep inside the high level has concealed the dark, vile, aggressive parts of himself/herself that seethe with frustration, self-loathing, bottomless emptiness.

Spouses and children of the high level narcissist become recipients of the vomiting of this horrid, ugly brew.

These events become frequent upon the part of the high level narcissist who is blaise about his primitive multiple transgressions against those closest to him. At times he blames the victim for his horrific behavior.  High levels don’t apologize for their outrageous behaviors

It is automatic for the high level for taking no blame since these individuals don’t develop a conscience.  Of course they draw the line on deeds that will get them into trouble.

With research and intuitive wisdom you recognize that you can no longer share yourself with a loathsome being who is transforming himself often into a permanent terrifying vile version of Mister Hyde.

You are fully awake and aware. Now is your time for separating yourself away from this daily nightmare.  You deserve to continue your process of evolutions as an individual who experiences solitude, inner peace, the gifts of your creativity, the company of those whom you can trust and who support and encourage your continued development as a person of insight, integrity and seeker of the truth.  You are on your way.  Give yourself special attribution for the journey you are taking on the pathway of the original self.

Linda Martinez-Lewi, Ph.D.

The Unwelcome Daughter of A Narcissistic Mother

High Level Narcissists Plot Their Way to the Top

High level narcissists are obsessively driven to reach the top of their mountains of ambition and publicly praised achievement, whether the goal is tremendous wealth, power, prestige, veneration.

For the high level this is a much easier goal since these individuals are very light in the conscience department. The narcissistic personality does not form a highly development conscience during his/her formative years. On the outside this person can appear to have a sense of decorum and obedience to the rules but when you look beneath the surface of the perfect façade you find an absence of adhering to what is right or wrong particularly in their dealings with individuals close to them: spouses, partners, ex-spouses, children, business associates.

It takes discernment and empathy to function with a highly developed conscience. The person of good character naturally thinks about how his behaviors thoughts and actions affect others and their well being.

The high level narcissist doesn’t give these considerations a thought.  Of course the high level cleverly goes through the motions and pretenses of having integrity but this is the thinnest of characterlogical veneers. In some quarters in their “religious lives the high level is able to fool members of his spiritual community into thinking that he/she is a fine person of integrity and morality.

I have observed that high levels obtain huge ego supplies by planning their route to the upper reaches of success.  They have a detailed agenda clearly in mind like a master blueprint that they will follow precisely.

Ultimately the high level narcissist is a predatory exploiter. With their charm and cunning they magnetize individuals to them who will take their irresistible bait – promises of love, a phenomenal lifestyle, social status, the capacity to have exotic experiences, invitations to the most exclusive golden circles.

High level narcissists have no difficulty at all abandoning their spouses, children, friends when according to their plan of success they must shift, in some instances leave their spouses and children to make their next ascendant move.

For the high level, this is an Everest move, a thrilling process that reinforces their sense of limitless power and perfection.  The high level is never bothered by those whom he abandons, even his own children. In some instances they buy off some of the kids whom they think are “promising” to make themselves look real good as a fake parent.

For the high level people are interchangeable and therefore, expendable. They do not understand or care in the least about the precious reality of the individual.

When he shifts to the next level this narcissist knows that he will easily find other partners who will satisfy his needs and wishes. These masters of deceit are thrilled with their progressions upward into the clouds that form the crown at the summit.

Along the way they have psychologically and emotionally harmed scores of individuals, abandoned and upended too many lives, including their children.  We don’t get a “do over” with kids—but with the high level this doesn’t matter.

With all of their feckless and dirty deeds high level narcissists sleep soundly at night while their victims stare at the ceiling, in the throes of another insomniac night, weep listlessly in the dark, or even blame themselves for all of the incalculable harm the high level has wrought. Those who ardently pray for an old testament god to reign down on these culprits hear silence.

You are the one who has borne and survived the cunning plots and plans of the high level narcissists

Now you know this person in full.  Understand that you are and never were to blame for his/her deceits, abandonments, vile projections, insidious acting out behaviors.

Give yourself tremendous credit for your psychological stamina, clear discernment, personal integrity, your unique creative gifts, compassion and empathy.

Linda Martinez-Lewi, Ph.D.

 

High Level Narcissist – Lies, More Lies, Damn Lies

High Level Narcissist: Lies, More Lies and Damn Lies

You have known for a long time, many Summers and Springs that you partner and spouse was lying to you by commission and omission.

You didn’t want to believe your perceptions and instincts.  When the message of untruth came across clearly, you retreated from your clarity and returned to your belief in the lies of the high level narcissist.  You have been under the spell of high level for decades.

High level narcissists gets a thrill out of lying to you.

You are under his control and the narcissist knows that he can play you anyway he wants. The high level has taken your measure and found your deepest vulnerabilities, your empathy, integrity, individuality.

The narcissist is obsessed with controlling your thoughts, feelings, plans, creative pursuits.

The shameless narcissist lies;  he/she perfected his perfidies as a young child.

Chronic lying is a permanent fixture of the high level narcissist.  Without a developed conscience you move adroitly, forcing your power position on your partner, spouse, ex-spouse, children.

Clever, cunning, predatory high level narcissists layer lie upon lie and experience giddy pleasure through their countless deceits. If they suspect they will be found out, the high level fashions a more “elegant lie” on top of the previous ones.

Their lies are served up with irresistible charm that makes you believe in them all over again. You make excuses for the high level. As a result your patterns of self-deception are reinforced.

As the high level narcissist lies, he oozes charm that is coupled with artfully designed promises that warm your heart and reinforce your attachment to them.

You make countless efforts to convince yourself that the narcissistic spouse or partner is a good person. You hold on to this false belief to reinforce the attachment to the high level narcissist and as a result postpone your rights to inner peace, respect for your personal boundaries and transformation and the rediscovery of you limitless creative gifts.

After numerous intuitive messages and inspirations and your research you awaken to the true reality of the high level narcissist and the travisties, deceits and traumas you have endured and sustained.  The voice of your real self says: No More!

You hear yourself say: I am moving in my own direction My compass is due north —-the truth, the source, the beauty, the hope, independence, calm, solitude, creativity, individuality unbounded.

 

 

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Children of Narcissistic Mothers – Re-Traumatized by High Level Narcissists

Children of Narcissistic Mothers – Re-Traumatized by High Level Narcissists

You grew up as a child of maternal deprivation.  Your mother’s presence was neither loving nor protective. Early on you knew that Narcissistic Mama (or Mothering Figure) couldn’t stand your presence, even as a little child.

Psychiatrist and researcher Dr. John Bowlby created the term Maternal Deprivation to describe a mother’s lack of attachment and warmth toward her child communicated as cold dismissiveness and lack of empathy.

These children even when their physical and environmental needs are met, experience an existential sense that there is something fundamentally wrong with them—mother doesn’t love them and therefore they are horribly defective.

As adults some of these children feel guilt and shame, a deep sense of unease for being imperfect and letting mother down.  They feel that they can never measure up no matter what they achieve professionally or personally.

As babies they looked into their mother’s eyes and discovered a void—a cold uncaring, dismissive “don’t come near me” revulsion.

Enter the high level narcissist, infused with magnetic charm, command of self, energetic, self-confident, charismatic.  Children of narcissistic mothers become entranced with the high level narcissist.  Their high energy, expanded egos, towering ambitions are compelling to the child of narcissistic maternal deprivation.  They are spell bound, caught up in the romantic magic of the high level.  They feel energized, hopeful about this new gambit.

Marriage and partnership with the high level narcissist is exciting in the beginning. The narcissist is on his or her very best behavior, winning the heart and mind of the partner.

After a short period of time, the narcissistic partner reveals their cruel, demanding, manipulative side.  You experience the extreme controlling qualities of the narcissistic partner. Everything you do or say or even think is monitored and judged.  You are the object of cruel, obnoxious projections frequently, of course, in private behind closed doors. You dare criticized, castigated for the smallest oversight or mistake.  You are name called, unjustly accused and criticized.

You often now feel anxious, jumpy just waiting for the next volley of insults and recriminations.  You develop chronic insomnia and digestive disorders.  Why do you tolerate this horrendous treatment.  In the back of your mind in the unconscious there is a part of you that still feels empty and unworthy and essential wrong and not enough.

You were traumatized as a small child and now you are being re-traumatized by your narcissistic spouse.

This is your time and opportunity for awakening to the true nature of the high level narcissist.

With deep insights and intuition and your research you become clear that you will move forward along your own pathway of recovery, transformation and the continued evolution of your true self.

Along the way you learn to be self entitled, deserving of inner peace, worthy of trust and warmth, the full use of your many creative gifts.

Practice self care: rest, sleep, movement/exercise, food, hydration, Nature.

Linda Martinez-Lewi, Ph.D.

Selfless Servants to High Level Narcissists

Selfless Servants to the High Level Narcissist

Besides jeopardizing their psychological and physical health, those who live with narcissists rob themselves of vital opportunities to develop their unique creative gifts. They often set aside their talents, drives and dreams to spend huge amounts of time and energy at the disposal of the obsessive acquisitiveness of their high level narcissistic partner.

The high level narcissist expects you to perform perfectly for them. Their demands are unrealistic and outrageous. Those who are trapped in these marital arrangements feel like they must acquiesce to the overpowering wills of their partners.

Some individuals who are partnered with high level narcissists grew up with a narcissistic parent. As children they were treated like servants, expected to have full charge of the younger children, even the babies in the family. As early as five years of age, these kids were expected to do the heavy housework, cooking, cleaning, fetching. Narcissistic mom or dad was constantly screaming at these small kids.  When the slightest mistake was made or something like the dinner didn’t turn out perfectly, the small son or daughters was horribly punished and made to feel ashamed and worthless.  Growing up under these conditions of psychological and emotional abuse and servitude is chilling.  As adults these individuals do not develop a healthy sense of self entitlement, a core belief that they are worthwhile, a sense of solid well being. They feel unworthy.

This is the reason why so many of them are attracted to the high level narcissist who is so charming and compelling in the beginning.  When the narcissistic partner turns ugly and becomes very demanding, these outrageous behaviors are familiar to the spouse who grew up as the unworthy child of the narcissistic parent.

Being a selfless servant to the high level narcissist is a familiar role to the adult child of a narcissistic parent. They go along to get along. Feeling unworthy and not enough these partners put up with the rages, humiliations, demands, iron will control of their psychologically abusive partner.

For some there is a time of awakening, a clear realization that they can no longer remain in this role of servitude. They recognize that they must move forward along their own unique pathway of their authentic self.

This is a decision of triumph and strength. Individuals who follow their own pathways embrace their individuality with all of their creative gifts and finally find respite, restoration and the fulfillment of their true selves.

Linda Martinez-Lewi, Ph.D.

 

Prevailing Over Malevolent High Level Narcissists

Prevailing Over the Malevolent High Level Narcissist

In a roiling sea  of high level narcissists you are often in a state of anxiety, worry, self-doubt, uncertainty, confusion. This is not surprising since the high level narcissist is a very tricky, shape-shifting individual.

Infused with mesmerizing charm, gifts of seduction and persuasion it is very difficult not to become entranced with the high level. They possess a kind of magic presence that is drawn from one of their enchanting personas. Their eye contact is riveting, almost hypnotic. We feel their appraisal and moves toward us. They are stepping up their game. They make plans to catch us in their psychological butterfly nets.

The high level narcissist searches out those whom he wants to become part of his coterie, his golden circle, that place of honor that the high level bestows on special people in his intimate enclave. Of course the high level is loyal to no one but himself. After years of blind devotion and arduous work the narcissist will discard you without explanation or ceremony if he has found someone better to serve his outrageous demands and impossible standards. The narcissist is immune to the suffering that he causes others. even his spouses and children. His search for self- aggrandizement has no bounds. Above it all, the high level narcissist is ultimately an exploiter, usurping the talents, creative energies and sometimes the morality and decency of others. He is feverish miner of the human gold of his victims. His see and destroy missions are without conscience or boundaries.

Always exploitive and controlling, the high level narcissist plots and plans his moves toward you. Being selected by a narcissist to play a role in his/her life drama is considered a great compliments and achievement.

As you move through your awakening to the true nature of the high level narcissist, remember who you are–the exact opposite of these individuals.

You can and will prevail and recover and restore your true original self.

Be reminded of the gifts which are unique to you. You are strong, sensitive, kind, intelligent, empathic, resolute, of fine character, creative and holy within.

Linda Martinez-Lewi, Ph.D.