If you survived your childhood—and that is a very tall order for many abused, neglected and deprived children— no one can psychologically harm you.It usually takes most of us a number of painful experiences to come to this realization. After all what we had to do to remain alive emotionally and psychologically meant that we had to become invisible, pretend who we weren’t, cower in a corner and hope that we would not be hit, hide from our parents at friends’ houses, disappear into libraries to escape the horrors of home and fill our minds with useful intellectual information. Libraries become a place of refuge for many children. In books we enter a world of enchantment where we can be transported to other worlds and away from the constant psychological pain of our dysfunctional families.
Those who have suffered abuse and neglect often choose as partners, individuals who will continue these kinds of behaviors. We are drawn back to what was familiar to us,even though it made our lives intolerable. Many children learn very early that they are unworthy of kindness or empathy. They become inured to cruelty and neglect. As they grow up they unconsciously expect this kind of treatment from others, including prospective partners.
At some point victims of emotional and psychological abuse wake up. Maybe the last time of being humiliated and shamed and even struck in the face by a spouse or partner was the last straw. They say to themselves: “I will not take this kind of treatment ever again.” This time they mean it and begin their journey toward healing and wholeness. No one can harm or destroy you psychologically. Learn to appreciate that you are a valuable unique human being who deserves respect and the reciprocation of love and appreciation. Send this message to others who are still suffering and trapped in this old cycle of abuse. Your life has begun anew—Keep your light shining day and night. You deserve to live with a spacious calm mind, the reciprocation of love and friendship and deep inner peace. Visit my website: www.thenarcissistinyourlife.com
Linda Martinez-Lewi, Ph.D.
Telephone Consultation: United States and International
Book: Freeing Yourself from the Narcissist in Your Life
Buy the book: amazon.com and amazon kindle edition