Many people hold those who have clinical psychology credentials, professional experience and esteemed reputations in high regard. (This post refers to male and female mental health professionals). There are many fine, gifted, empathic and highly ethical psychotherapists. They had decided to start a career in this industry because they wanted to make a difference in the lives of people in the community, and places like Upskilled may have helped them to get there. Most of them want to provide you with the utmost care. But this may not be the case in all of them. I am specifically talking about psychotherapists who are narcissistic personalities. The narcissistic psychotherapist (psychiatrist, psychoanalyst, psychologist, etc.) can do substantial even grave psychological and emotional harm to his clients. These individuals project their self loathing, raw rage, humiliations, feelings of worthlessness on to clients who come to them in crisis. The narcissistic psychotherapist has boundary issues and in some instances may suggest that you have a dual relationship–that you become friends and acquaintances. There are clinicians who will ask to see you outside of the office or those who make seductive, inappropriate remarks about your appearance and others who demean and humiliate you with their cruel, harsh words. Those who come to therapists are often in a state of desperation, confusion, emotional chaos, severe anxiety or deep sadness and depression. You are placing yourself in the hands of someone whom you believe and assume has done the necessary psychological inner work on themselves to know their deepest core issues. When you unwittingly choose a narcissistic therapist you will not be getting the treatment that you deserve nor will you make progress toward identifying and resolving your key issues. Rather, you will become the victim of the therapist’s psychopathology. Ironically, the client in this instance is “paying ” the psychotherapist so that he or she can treat you any way that suits them. Some of these individuals have issues with impulse control, will shift into a dark ugly mood and project hurtful unconscious contents on to you. I have spoken with many clients who have been the recipient of these hostile attacks. Some believe that this is their fault and internalize these cruelties. Say “No” to your old voice of self criticism. Stand up for yourself and your healing. If you sense or intuit that a therapist is a narcissistic personality, show yourself out through the door of freedom. Trust your powers of observation and deep intuition. This is an essential part of your psychological and emotional healing. You will find a psychotherapist who is worthy of you, can understand and empathize with you and with whom you can form a solid healthy therapeutic alliance. Linda Martinez-Lewi, Ph.D., author of Freeing Yourself from the Narcissist in Your Life.
4 thoughts on “Narcissistic Psychotherapists Cause Psychological Damage”
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Thank You. thank you thank you
This is a great article. As I understand it, becoming a psychotherapist requires many, many hours of going through psychoanalysis. Yes, a Narcissist is skilled at pretense and receipt, therefore I would expect their narcissisim to be discovered. But, like tends to find like. Perhaps these people slip through by guiding themselves through the process by finding those who are just like themselves, or even more skillfully finding those who aren’t skilled enough. Being the child of a covert narcissist mother, and finally finding my way out of her web, I am adept at seeing these people quite easily, but those who don’t know much about it might actually seek out a narcissist therapist because this is what they know. It’s a difficult spot to be in…finding the best therapist for youself, but if you’re unaware, you might just put yourself in the kind of relationship you’re accustomed too; it’s like any other relationship. If you haven’t learned yet what the issues are, you will most likely end up in exactly what you don’t want. If you’re reading this blog, I’d bet you’re on the right path, so best wishes and as Dr. Linda says
“Trust your powers of observation and deep intuition. This is an essential part of your psychological and emotional healing. You will find a psychotherapist who is worthy of you, can understand and empathize with you and with whom you can form a solid healthy therapeutic alliance. Linda Martinez-Lewi, Ph.D., author of Freeing Yourself from the Narcissist in Your Life.” I was very lucky to find a therapist who understood me. She never judged and she always encouraged.
Doug
Hi My daughter was told by her counsellor that she had a Narcissistic mother when she was looking for answers about dealing with her own feelings about a lot of things in her life, including how she apparently felt about her relationship with me as her mother and only parent. I am wondering if it is really possible for a counsellor to know someone is a narcissistic person without ever meeting them or knowing them. My daughter acted on the information the counsellor gave her by deciding over night that she did not want me in her life any more and stopped my grandson from seeing me, despite the fact we had previously had a very positive relationship. As part of a rather lengthy court case for access to my grandson it has been shown by medical professionals that I do not have the mental illness my daughter said I did. I would appreciate your feedback as I feel the counsellor has done my daughter a grave disservice, and ot the end of her 3 year counselling left her with nowhere to go to work through her reaction to the counsellors information other than to pull a whole family apart.
I still don’t trust any therapists after what happened to me. I need a way to separate the predatory from everyone else.