Entitled, shameless, supremely arrogant—narcissists get away with almost anything, especially if they wield power, exude charm and are well connected. In their private lives, super narcissists—CEO’s, top entertainers, powerful politicians and upper echelon professionals, write their own tickets, doing whatever they desire and want. They choose marital and romantic partners who cling to them, feed on their delusions of grandeur and ingest massive doses of abuse for unlimited periods of time.
Narcissists are gifted at juggling several partners at once. There is the wife or husband who is chosen for his/her perfect external image, education and professional credential, family heritage and high social standing. Narcissists are skilled handlers, keeping their romantic partners in the air and on the string. Since the narcissist is incapable of genuinely caring about any of these individuals, swinging from one person to the next is effortless and thrilling for them. It’s a game. There are no human attachments or feelings on the narcissist’s part. If one lover or spouse doesn’t work out, there is always someone else, even more desirable and willing to take his/her place. The narcissist is the writer, director, producer and star of his movie. Everyone else is playing the roles defined by the narcissist to ignite and sustain his star power.
High level narcissists have swagger and nerve. Flaunting their carelessness, they are reckless with the feelings of others. If a spouse or lover cannot tolerate the narcissist’s frequent betrayals and abuse, they are shown the door. Narcissists lie to everyone all of the time. They lie to themselves and live in a perpetual state of grandiose delusion. High level narcissists are constantly reinforced in their outrageous behaviors by a society that handsomely rewards those who achieve extraordinary material success, celebrity and power. The current external world, driven by a manic compulsion for continuous excitement and adrenaline driven thrills, fawns on narcissists. Within this paradigm, character, conscience and kindness are faded remnants from a naive, unsophisticated past.
Learning to skillfully identify narcissistic personalities and mastering ways of dealing with them, will reinforce your strong sense of self and protect you from the chaos and suffering that they leave behind. Visit my website:www.thenarcissistinyourlife.com
Linda Martinez-Lewi, Ph.D.