Narcissistic men, especially those that know how to turn on the charm and male provocativeness on a moment’s notice appear to do very well with women in the romantic department. This is particularly true if they are successful in business or their profession. If they are physically attractive and in addition have that over-confident sparkle, women are drawn to them like honey. They have their pick of women and use it to their fullest advantage. However, they are incapable of forming a genuine relationship with a woman or anyone else.
Many narcissistic men, especially those who are golden boys of their narcissistic mothers are emasculated. They have psychologically fused with the mother very early and as a result mama own them. They were molded as very young boys, adored by the narcissistic mother, told they were superior and could do no wrong, allowed to be very cruel to their siblings and school mates and given no sense of limits. With some of these mothers there is an erotic tie between mother and son that the mother perpetuates. She chooses her son over her husband as an object of her female attention. These scenarios are not literally acted out but the psychological fusion is powerful. The narcissistic son is owned by his mother–she is his psychological partner.
This boy and then adult male cannot release himself from mother or his own narcissism. Deep inside he both fears and hates women. This, despite every woman he has seduce or claimed to love. This narcissistic maternal tie remains unbroken. Women married to these men are treated with psychological abuse—screaming rages, humiliations, accusations, threats and horrendous projections, are in a constant state of fear.
In many cases the spouse recognizes that she can no longer take this abuse, researches the narcissistic personality and recognizes that her narcissistic husband will always belong to mama.
Women who leave their emasculated narcissistic spouses are greatly relieved and move toward leading their own lives. Many of them find genuine men who are capable of loving women and sharing their lives with them. To learn about the narcissistic personality in-depth, visit my website:thenarcissistinyourlife.com
Linda Martinez-Lewi, Ph.D.
Telephone Consultation: United States and International
Book: Freeing Yourself from the Narcissist in Your Life