The Unsuspected—A goldmine of pathological narcissism is among those you would never imagine share this disorder—“Spiritual Healers” —those received as royalty and great holy masters through their million dollar book sales, endless rotating seminars that encompass the globe, their cds, dvds, audios, internet classes and trainings they offer. Their schedules are so full it is remarkable that they are able to move through each crowded day. But remember this is a narcissistic personality who never tires from being on center stage, viewed as superior even semi-divine, a super mentor, a saint in human form.
There are individuals of high consciousness who truly help people to heal: physically, psychologically, emotionally, spiritually. These people have their egos dropped, are not after a money motive. They charge fees that are fair. Some of them are very successful and do produce books and seminars and dvds that sell very well. I am not talking about these individuals. I am speaking about pathological narcissistic personality.
Today many people are looking for a quick mystical fix. They want an instant miracle, a tectonic shift in their lives–right now. The pseudo narcissistic healer cunningly offers that tantalizing potion through his charisma, charm, clever magic words in a well rehearsed presentation. After someone is hooked by him or her, the seduction is complete. It’s like opening up your heart and giving it away, opening up your wallet and bank account and saying: “Take what you want.”, breaching your mind and psyche and saying, “I believe you; I will follow you.” The pseudo spiritual healer practices a form of brain washing that is very effective with a substantial segment of human beings.
Narcissistic spiritual healers ensnare the most vulnerable–those who are fresh from a personal tragedy or loss, the very lonely who have been abandoned by family or spouses, those with intolerable feelings of anxiety, those who feel depressed and depleted by the burden of their lives, the dependent ones who are always looking for someone to cling to because they cannot tolerate another moment of their raw unrelenting pain of psychological emptiness.
Learn how to identify these pseudo spiritual con artists. Listen to their sweet talk pitch, the eyes that appear to melt with your sorrow, the nonverbal cues that reach out to console, the vacant promise that you will be completely healed and your life will be resurrected (if you sign up for thousands of dollars of course sessions). Watch how much money you are being asked to invest in this “spiritual” project. Is it multi-level? Will there be other courses required? How much are you being cleverly pressured? Listen to the voice of your intuition first in a whisper, then like a mighty wind that cries: “Don’t do it!’ “Don’t sign up!” “These people are parasites exploiting you.” “Back away.” “Say “No” now.”
Identifying the narcissistic spiritual healer before you take the bait is highly empowering. If you have fallen for these tricks and ruses in the past, don’t blame yourself. Now you are wise to the game. You are in charge, walking your own path, listening to the wisdom that flows through you.
Linda Martinez-Lewi, Ph.D.